25th Jul 08
Finally discharged frm hospital.......Have been resting at home and on hospital leave for one week.
Haven't been able to sleep well......Or I be waking up in the middle of the night.....I guess is due to the high dosage of steriods that are pump into my body......
Headache has gone away. I have regain the control of my left limbs....This is a sign of the good news as it shows the inflammation on the brain artery healing.....
However, I am still unable to see clearly...Many times I see flashes of light and blur vision....I hope time will heal everyting......hopefully the miracle expensive medicine Rituximab will have a effect on me......although 90% of the patients respond to the medicine, I hope I am not so unlucky to fall under that 10%........
Sometimes...is really kind of depressing when you thought your disease is under control...and suddenly it shoot right up to the head....
At times I lament, When will I be able to lead a normal life like all the other people...when will I be able to start my own family? When will GOD every be fair to me...and give me what I should be having?
Friday, July 25, 2008
Sunday, July 20, 2008
Sunday,20 Jul 2008
Felt better today and decided to blog. Had mri scan and nerve test done for the pass few days. Scan result shows that the antibodies has switch from attacking my tummy to my brain. Now my artery in my right brain is inflammed.
That is why I have been having bad headache, bluring of vision and losing feeling on my left side of the body. Gosh..I cried non stop when I heard this news from my doctor.... Is such a scary thing. He says if I have come in later, my blood vessel would have burst and resulted in stroke. Lucky I discover it early......
I am frightened as well as in a loss...He mentioned that my flu viral infection might have trigger the antibodies activity as I did not rest well during the period to recover properly.
Had my $5000 rituximab infusion done yesterday. I guess Dr Koh feels is critical for me as it has start attacking my brain. I felt feverish throughout the infusion. Thou not as bad side effect as he has mention.
Rituximab has kill all my b-cells including all the antibodies. Which means I am very weak now and prone to infection as I do not have any antibodies to fight off germs....Hoever, the B-cells will regenerate slowly and it will then be time for my infusion....
I guess now is a time for me to make a choice to drop my current stressful job and find a normal no stress 9-6pm admin job.....so that I can live my life happily...
Hopefully my KT is supportive of this....as he was never supportive in the past.....
Felt better today and decided to blog. Had mri scan and nerve test done for the pass few days. Scan result shows that the antibodies has switch from attacking my tummy to my brain. Now my artery in my right brain is inflammed.
That is why I have been having bad headache, bluring of vision and losing feeling on my left side of the body. Gosh..I cried non stop when I heard this news from my doctor.... Is such a scary thing. He says if I have come in later, my blood vessel would have burst and resulted in stroke. Lucky I discover it early......
I am frightened as well as in a loss...He mentioned that my flu viral infection might have trigger the antibodies activity as I did not rest well during the period to recover properly.
Had my $5000 rituximab infusion done yesterday. I guess Dr Koh feels is critical for me as it has start attacking my brain. I felt feverish throughout the infusion. Thou not as bad side effect as he has mention.
Rituximab has kill all my b-cells including all the antibodies. Which means I am very weak now and prone to infection as I do not have any antibodies to fight off germs....Hoever, the B-cells will regenerate slowly and it will then be time for my infusion....
I guess now is a time for me to make a choice to drop my current stressful job and find a normal no stress 9-6pm admin job.....so that I can live my life happily...
Hopefully my KT is supportive of this....as he was never supportive in the past.....
Thursday, July 17, 2008
16 Jul 2008....
Unable to sleep since 4am in the morning.......haven been having severe headache...and felt nausea.....my whole left side of my arm and left cheek is numb....I couldnt feel anyting on them....nor can I control my limbs movement..... I was very scared....I am afraid I might have stroke or pararlysed at the moment.......
finally 7am...I couldnt take it anymore....ask KT to send me to A&E to seek treatment....doctor wanted to hospitalised me for further investigation...for symptons of mild stroke.....at this moment....I couldn't believe my ears..how could someone like me at this age, don't drink, don't smoke, sleep at 10pm everday and exercise regularly could have suffer stroke..besides, I do not have high blood pressure or high cholesterol.....
I was given 2 doses of painkiller before the pain subside....doctor still inisit to hospitalised me..as I got so much work to do, I decided to leave hosp at my own risk......took the day off to rest at home.....doctor gave me 6 days of mc
the next day 17th Jul 2008.....
went to work as usual as I was feeling better..suddenly my whole left arm was numb...no feeling for 20mins....I was dead worried and call up my NUH doctor...was ask to go down immediately....they wanted to admit me as they feel I have symptons of mild stroke...gosh....
this time I got no choice but to be admitted..I hope this is not going to affect my work performance......Praying hard...noting is going to happen to me......life has never been fair to me...so much things has happen to me....Is this karma?
Unable to sleep since 4am in the morning.......haven been having severe headache...and felt nausea.....my whole left side of my arm and left cheek is numb....I couldnt feel anyting on them....nor can I control my limbs movement..... I was very scared....I am afraid I might have stroke or pararlysed at the moment.......
finally 7am...I couldnt take it anymore....ask KT to send me to A&E to seek treatment....doctor wanted to hospitalised me for further investigation...for symptons of mild stroke.....at this moment....I couldn't believe my ears..how could someone like me at this age, don't drink, don't smoke, sleep at 10pm everday and exercise regularly could have suffer stroke..besides, I do not have high blood pressure or high cholesterol.....
I was given 2 doses of painkiller before the pain subside....doctor still inisit to hospitalised me..as I got so much work to do, I decided to leave hosp at my own risk......took the day off to rest at home.....doctor gave me 6 days of mc
the next day 17th Jul 2008.....
went to work as usual as I was feeling better..suddenly my whole left arm was numb...no feeling for 20mins....I was dead worried and call up my NUH doctor...was ask to go down immediately....they wanted to admit me as they feel I have symptons of mild stroke...gosh....
this time I got no choice but to be admitted..I hope this is not going to affect my work performance......Praying hard...noting is going to happen to me......life has never been fair to me...so much things has happen to me....Is this karma?
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